Fearless Moral Inventory

February approaches and I'm beginning to formulate a more coherent outline for the Challenge moving forward. This post is more or less a checklist of my planned revisions, wants, and goals for the coming spring.

Changes:

1.) New layout. This unoffensive blueness has to go. It sends a message of complacency and mediocrity that I can't tolerate for much longer. See that border up there? I was hoping to replace it with some sort of epic mural - preferably of jets bombing an already burned-out city populated solely by renegade militia and the zombified corpses of members of the Green Party. If you have suggestions, get back at me.

2.) Coherence. I got some flak over the summer for not staying on-mission with my posts, and indeed, I often did vigorously depart from the promised political/pugilistic format of this blog. I'm sorry for entertaining you. I'll be sure to stay on task. I also heard a lot of you complaining that you didn't get all of my references. It's called an internet. There are literally billions of them. Install one on your computer and use it for informations.

New Content:

1.) Mail Call. I feel like this thing might get old without feedback. So, I'm un-hiding my e-mail. I encourage, nay, beg you to send me your feedback, along with any ideas, questions, etc. I'm hoping to have a recurring (hopefully periodic) Q&A post, where I field questions or suggestions from you groundlings (I'm looking at you, Bob). In the interest of security and lulz, I reserve the right to censor your letters or even replace them with better ones.

2.) Presidential Kombat. This project fell on its face (and was subsequently deleted) for two reasons: First, it was unbearably onerous to administer. Second, no one was pushing Reagan up with me, while Woodrow Wilson actually got a vote. I'll hopefully bring it back in March, but I'm planning on implementing a simple bracket system, as opposed to a ladder. To seed the bracket, I will employ a select panel of judges (me) to deliberate behind closed doors some time next month. This will run concurrently with March Madness.

Also, here's a portrait of Jean-Luc Picard:

It's from an article on Breitbart contrasting the leadership of our president and Captain Picard which I somehow didn't write. I just want to point out now that I began the coming trend of nerd-culture political journalism.

I'll be back in February. In the meantime, I have to go to war with Breitbart with bottles and chains. The line must be drawn HERE!

Resurrection

Dear Readers,

This past August, I allowed the Obama Challenge to pass into dereliction without as much as a "thanks for reading" from yours truly. For this, I apologize. I'd always intended to end the project at the Summer/Fall transition as I prepared to return to class. So thank you all for the support, and for the lulz. As a whole, the project was a resounding success, putting me into the best physical shape in my life and conditioning my mind to the point that I am now a borderline telepath.

But this victory has proven fleeting, as in the months that followed, it became increasingly obvious that I needed to resume my work on the Challenge. Since August, the President has maliciously and deliberately been instigating a conflict between he and I, packing a proverbial keg with also-proverbial gunpowder. I cite as examples:
1. The Caligula-esque discord he has sown in the public, as evidenced by his historically poor approval ratings.
2. His acceptance of the Stalin Award (you may know it as the "Nobel Peace Prize").
3. Proving himself to be, in all truth and honesty, a separate incarnation of George W. Bush.

Now you may say "but everyone saw this coming", and you'd be right. I expected an extreme amount of tension between he and I moving forward, but I always believed it to be manageable...until now. As many of you know, the President has recently sought to derail a long-awaited, epochal event in American history. Namely, he has threatened to schedule the State of the Union on top of the premier of the final season of Lost. Trivial? That's what many said when Archduke Ferdinand was shot by Franz Kafka. Or whoever.

This is the most reprehensible of transgressions, Mr. Obama, and perhaps your worst to date. A leader may trample our liberties from time to time, but he should never, ever stand between a man and his leisure. I'll see you in the ring, Mr. President.

The Obama Challenge resumes this February.