Monday, July 20, 2009

Veterans' Affairs?

I'm not even sure what this department does, and I refuse to research it. But, based on the title, I've decided to appoint Connor MacLeod as the Secretary of Veterans' Affairs.

For those of you who are too pretentious or female to get the reference, it's from the Highlander. The premise is this: He is immortal, and he is compelled to wander the earth in search of other immortals so that he may decapitate them and steal their strength. Repeat until there is only one. There. I just explained The Highlander to you. If this is your first time hearing this, enjoy going to Starbuck's with your douchebag girlfriend/boyfriend.

Anyway, as a product of his epicness, Mr. MacLeod has been alive for several hundred years, and has seen him some pretty ridiculous shit. Including Sean Connery. So yeah, I'd say Mr. MacLeod knows well the ravages and aftermath of war. I can't think of anyone better situated to guide policy concerning how we should accommodate and honor the sacrifices of the bravest members of our society. ("WHAT? He DOES know what the department does! He DID do the research!" Of course I did, bitches! YOU GOT OBAMACHALLENGE'D!)

And instead of listing his qualifications, I've decided to simply include a few photos of people he's killed in single combat. (Note: That's a stupid idea. I'll just include three different pictures of The Kurgan, since that'll be three times as impressive.)







Next!

1 comment:

  1. The Highlander...was a documentary. And it occurred...in real time!

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