Admittedly, Mr. LeBeau has little experience in government or community service. In fact, in his early years, he engaged in decidedly anti-community service - namely theft, gambling, and whoring.
However, Mr. LeBeau is unique in that he is one of the few individuals alive who flatly disregards the Law of Conservation of Energy. As a result, Mr. LeBeau will be taking a hands-on approach to domestic energy policy. Literally. Since he charges physical objects with energy by touching him. I expect that his day-to-day operations will include the creation of raw kinetic energy that this country needs to fuel its dynamic infrastructure. And better yet, it's all clean and carbon free. You're welcome, Sierra Club. Of course, when he's not pacifying granola-munching "consultants", he'll be savagely beating Steven Chu into purpley submission. Or not, since Mr. Chu has extensive experience with lasers. Whatever.
Either way, Remy LeBeau was born and raised in New Orleans. Which means he probably lost everything he ever knew ever in all time forever in Hurricane Katrina. So if you don't support him you're automatically a heartless racist.
Is it too late for me to make nominations for your consideration as potential cabinet members? How about Denny Crane for Attorney General? John McClain for Secretary of Defense? Marlow Stanfield for Secretary of Housing and Urban Development?
ReplyDeleteAlso, I liked it better when they were called ministries instead of "executive departments". I always enjoyed the British having a "Minister of War" rather than a "Secretary of Defense". Secretary implies "womanly" and we all know that women have weak arms.
Marlo Stanfield Wish Granted!
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